When you first get involved in a network marketing business, you inevitably come
to a point where you want to quit. You realize that it is hard work. Youve
been rejected. Youve awoken to the fact that the dream of becoming independently
wealthy through network marketing doesnt just magically manifest itself.
What separates the few who manage to scale the wall from those who simply crash into it and are left lying in a heap at its base? Simply, its their ability to walk themselves through their doubts and fears.
It is often said that F.E.A.R. is False Evidence Appearing Real.
As a child, you might have seen a scary shadow at night in your bedroom. Remember how you were convinced it was a monster ready to eat you? When your mother came in and turned on the light, you discovered that the monster was really just your coat hanging on the back of the closet door. With the light came the reality that it wasnt something scary at all, and it probably left you feeling foolish for letting your imagination get the best of you.
Network marketing is very much like that: it is a business that involves the unknown. Walking yourself through the fear of the unknown is the same thing as turning on the light. This process involves three steps.
1. Identify Your Fears
When you come upon a place in your business that makes you uncomfortable, ask yourself: Why am I feeling this way? and write down the answersthey can serve as a road map later when you find yourself back in the same uncomfortable position.
For example, during the period when I was in qualification for a particular title in my network marketing company, I became very stressed. I couldnt sleep, I was agitated and my imagined eventual failure kept playing over and over in my head. I knew I had to get a grip and examine what was causing me such conflict. I identified three fears:
1) Fear of failure. I surmised that if I failed to qualify, it would mean my team would see me as a fraudsomeone who could talk the talk but not walk the walk.
2) Fear of success. I was unsure what the promotion really would mean for me. Was I truly someone whom others should see as a leader? Was I ready for that responsibility?
3) Fear of relaxing. Going into this period of qualification had required extremely long hours, with not enough time for my family and myself to slow down and relax.
Identifying these fears allowed me to take the next step.
2. Shine the Light
As soon as I identified my fears, I realized they were based upon lies I was telling myself.
For instance, I was worried I would be perceived as a fraud, when in truth, I knew I had a very loving and supportive team. If I didnt make the qualification, my team would sympathize with me and be ready to give it another try.
My second fear was just as irrational as the first. I was afraid that I couldnt measure up to the other people in my company who had made it to the top, that they had something I didnt have.
When I turned on the light, the reality was much different. I could see that the journey I had taken to get to this point in my business had more than equipped me with the leadership qualities I needed. Not only would I be able to continue in my own success, but I would also be able to aid others in theirs.
I also recognized that the stress I was feeling was something I had created myself. I asked myself what I needed to do to relieve the feeling of overwhelm and took action: I took a short break and spent the following afternoon relaxing with my family.
Going through the process of examining these fears had alleviated them and cleared the way for the final step.
3. Monitor your Self-Talk
People listen more to their self-speak than to anyone else.
In his book The Voice of Knowledge, Don Miguel Ruiz, a medical doctor and Toltec Shaman, explains that in the creation story of Adam and Eve, the serpent who lived in the Tree of Knowledge was the Prince of Lies. The Prince contaminated the trees fruit with lies; when Adam and Eve ingested the fruit, they also ingested the lies of you are not good enough and you cant do this. Ruiz says, In that moment, our spiritual eyes closed and we could no longer see the world with the eyes of truth.
The beauty of the Toltec perspective is that once you are conscious of the lies and you identify them, you can silence them and start seeing yourself with the eyes of truth, as the magnificent and powerful being you are.
Begin to listen to your thoughts. When you hear negative self-talk and nagging doubts, ask yourself if they are based in reality. When you realize they arent, let them go once and for all.
Walking yourself through your fears and doubts allows you to restore your power by leaving you with the perspective of truth, which will squash your fears and doubts. It gives you the nudge you need to keep going when those around you are getting buried in the heap. Ultimately, it empowers you to scale the wall into the place where anything is possible, especially the success you envisioned when you first made the decision to become involved in network marketing.
STACY DE PRATER SHELTON is a former broadcast
and print journalist who is currently writing a book about
her journey through breast cancer. She is an active network
marketer who has reached the top levels in her company.