It’s pretty clear that every networker wants to access and experience greater levels of abundance in his or her life, including financial abundance. In fact, for many this desire for abundance was the impetus

for starting their networking business.

Unfortunately, despite this universal desire for abundance, many networkers are not experiencing it! Why is this?

One of the most common reasons I have observed and experienced is simply this: Many networkers do not experience the abundance they say they want because they are not willing to go through the “don’t wants” necessary to access and experience it.

Let’s say that you want to have a $5000 monthly income from your networking business. The challenge comes from the fact that in order to access the abundance you say you want, you must be willing to do things you don’t want to do, at times when you don’t want to do them.

The Rite of Crunchies

Let me give you an example from competitive basketball. Anyone who has ever played competitive basketball will be familiar with a conditioning routine known as “crunchies,” “killers” or “suicides.”

The running of “crunchies” —a tortuous combination of windsprints interspersed with bending and squatting that burns in your lungs, quadriceps and hamstrings—is so common in basketball that I’m confident that even Michael Jordan has experienced this grueling conditioning routine many times over. But I have yet to meet a single basketball player who has said that he or she wants to run crunchies. I know of no one who looks forward to running crunchies or has “felt like” running crunchies. Yet they all have—even players like Michael Jordan.

If they don’t want to run them, why do they run them anyway? Because their desire, their want, is stronger than their don’t-want-to’s and don’t-feel-like-it’s.

Let’s say a basketball player wants to be a starter on his team, and wants his team to win the championship. The strength of that desire makes him willing to do things that he doesn’t like to do or want to do (i.e., crunchies) because he realizes that doing so will support him to achieve what he wants.

Every successful basketball player has run hundreds or even thousands of crunchies, despite not wanting to, not feeling like it and/or not enjoying them.

The Networker’s Crunchies

The same can be said of any successful networker or entrepreneur. What has made it possible for the successful networker to experience the success she wanted was her willingness to do all the things that supported her—even if and when she didn’t want to.

What are some of these don’t-want-to’s for the successful networker—these conditioning routines you must be willing to do in order to have the abundance, freedom and ease you say that you want? While the answer is different for everyone, some of the most common “don’t wants” include:

• Talking to people about your business.

• Making phone calls.

• Keeping accurate and up-to-date financial records for your business.

• Selling.

• Being told “no.”

• Telling someone else “no.”

• Being consistent.

• Investing in your own personal development.

• Being coached.

• Working.

• Learning new skills.

• Practicing.

• Developing new ways of thinking and operating.

• Making mistakes.

• Following a system.

• Being open.

• Working evenings and/or weekends.

• Admitting you don’t know how.

• Asking for help and support.

• Being accountable.

• Taking action.

• Replying to e-mails promptly.

• Spending money.

• Saving money.

• Being organized.

• Taking a chance.

• Trying something new.

• Learning and growing.

Here’s the bottom line: in order to access and experience the abundance you say you want, you must be willing to be uncomfortable. Most networkers (in fact, most human beings) don’t want to experience discomfort. We don’t want to experience fear or rejection or humiliation or embarrassment or pain. Our attachment to comfort prevents us from experiencing the abundance that is available to us on the other side of our “uncomfortable zone.”

Imagine an astronaut who wants to experience the weightlessness of being in space but is unwilling to go through the process of escaping earth’s gravitational field because it’s uncomfortable, stressful, dangerous and even painful. In this situation, his don’t-want-to’s are preventing him from having the experience of weightlessness, ease and freedom he wants.

For many networkers, the idea of accessing and experiencing abundance is linked in their minds with the idea of experiencing greater ease and freedom in their lives. What they don’t understand is that, as with the astronaut, ease is only possible on the other side of discomfort. In truth, the process of accessing abundance is not always fun or easy.

In many ways, it all comes down to a foundational principle of success and abundance: What you focus on most is what will continue to show up and expand in your life.

When you focus on your don’t-want-to’s, they will keep showing up and expanding in your life. You give them energy; your resistance to them makes them only stronger.

The process of accessing abundance requires that you focus on what you do want and intend to have; to use the energy of that desire to develop the discipline, consistency and courage needed to go through the “gravity” of your don’t-want-to’s; and take those actions that will ultimately support you.

TERESA ROMAIN is the President and Founder of
Access Abundance!™ Services International, an organization
dedicated to helping people access greater levels of abundance,
freedom and fulfillment in their daily lives. She
lives with her husband, Dan, near the small town of Big Springs, Wisconsin.